survival

note that not everybody you know, likes you, and not everybody you will meet, will like you.

yesterday i had a talk with my mom and sister. a rather long one, which ended with a conclusion that “some people exist in your world just to teach you a lesson, if not one, several,” and i suppose it’s a logical resolution which i’d like to think that most of us would agree on.

i’m only twenty three this year and i’ve met a lot of people who have given me a rough time trying to grow up staying sane enough for the society to deal with (okay i may be over exaggerating here). not saying i’ve had it worst, but there are others out there who are growing up with in a more unfavourable manner, and i can’t help but pay my utmost respect for each of you out there who are just winging it to survive.

i’m not even going to bother going into details, but most of my problems revolve around human interaction. growing up being very expressive had eventually taught me to suppress my feelings and emotions most of the time, so it’s no wonder why most people can’t detect whenever i feel the slightest disagreement or disappointment towards a particular issue. i wasn’t brought up with a mindset thinking that i should try my best to be diplomatic and stay neutral whenever someone throws a fit about something that i’m involved in, but after tonnes of trials and errors, getting into arguments for what i think is ‘right’,  i still have problems trying to see the thin line between ‘standing up for myself while staying neutral with the other party’, and ‘being stepped on’.

that’s exactly the problem though. i want peace. between everybody. i try my best to stay neutral, but i still have the habit of disliking some people (which is just something that everyone encounters especially when a person doesn’t think the same way we do). however any form of dislike can be countered by self-consoling. you could always tell yourself to spare about 30 to 40% of room in your brain and heart for this person’s good qualities and for what good they’ve done for you, their family and even the society, then store 60 or 70% of the bad qualities you find in ’em in another box, chuck it all away or at least store it temporarily somewhere until you eventually forget about it.

it takes training. especially when you’re in a society where jealousy and envy play a huge role in terms of emotional influence. a person could be so good to you, be super friendly, be helpful and kind, yet clouded by cruel intentions that towers over all the hatred that exists in this world. that’s the sad truth about life, and when you’ve found some people who’ve proven their loyalty to you, grasp these fellas with all your might, even if it takes a million tubes of silicone glue to have them stuck on to you for the rest of their lives.

so yeah. sometimes these people who exist as a test may change your point of view in life temporarily or permanently, be it positively or negatively, but with their existence around, at least you know, that not everybody you know likes you and not everybody you will meet, will like you.

the world’s temporary, and that’s why.

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